We have already looked at some basic breathing exercises. Now let’s take it a little further.
“Cologne“ breathing (4711*)
You might be heading into a difficult meeting or maybe there are only 2 minutes to relax. Breathe in counting to 4, then slowly breathe out counting to 7. Repeat 11 times. You should feel a lot calmer afterwards.
(* 4711 is a mnemonic based on one of the earliest and most popular eau de cologne in europe)
Dropping to tent
When we get tense we usually lift our shoulders and create a horizontal line, like a wall. It signal stress back to our body which then gets even more tense. You can train yourself to drop your shoulders to form a tent shape instead. Every time you breathe out, you drop the shoulders a little more. You can practice this while walking or sitting or waiting. Over time it becomes more natural and helps not to get so stressed.
Color breathing
Ask yourself how you would like to feel and what color that feeling would have. Then you can imagine that by breathing in you can fill yourself with that color. If you want to, you can also ask yourself what you want to let go of, give it a color and breathe it out. You can combine this with a light exercise.
If colors are triggering to you, you can also use shapes for this. Like breathing in circles or breathing out squares.
If that is still triggering, you can find a scene or picture you like and breathe in the atmosphere of that picture until it fills you with good vibes.
You can also use this to breathe out pain. Let go of it a little more with every time you breathe out.
Feather Breathing
Being mindful of the body while doing a breathing exercise might still be too difficult for you and cause so much discomfort, that it is doesn’t calm you. Then you can use imagery to support your breathing. Imagine you are holding both of your hands in front of you, palms facing up, and there is a light white feather in one of them. When you breathe in, it slowly lifts into the air and as you breathe out it floats down into your other hand. Let the feather float back and forth gently for a few minutes. If you don’t like feathers, you could also use a butterfly or something else you can relate to and if you don’t want to imagine your hands, you could also just look at a landscape instead. Always modify imagery as needed.
If you have DID, I would like to encourage you to do a breathing exercise together. Every part who wants to join can pay mindful attention to a different aspect of your breath. One might be able to notice the belly moving, one observes the chest lifting. If someone is a little scared of the torso, they might like to see if the shoulders are moving or how the air feels when it gets sucked into the nose. Those parts who don’t want to pay attention to the body at all, could take over the task of thinking “breathing in – breathing out“ in sync with your exercise or count or use imagery like the feather or a balloon that is filled and emptied in the same rhythm as your breathing. The goal is to have everyone join the exercise in a way that is available for them.
It is challenging at first, but it gets easier over time.
Then maybe you could start to share your perception with each other, like a puzzle, putting together all the pieces, of belly, chest, shoulders, nose… to have one big, integrated perception of yourself breathing and thinking.
While this exercise is calming and refreshing, it also improves co-consciousness and helps to get a more integrated experience of life. It seems like a small tool but it is very powerful in its effects.
The Foghorn
This time we will add noise to our breathing exercise. Imagine you are a big old foghorn that is able to sound through the white clouds of dissociation around you and that secures safe passage into the harbor of reality and home. Without forcing anything, breathe in and when slowly breathing out, let the foghorn sound with a long “VOUUUU“. The vowel is soft, like in ‘you’. It makes a deep sound that might tingle a bit in your throat and sometimes even down into the belly. Let it fade naturally as you run out of air. The body pauses for a moment between breathing out and breathing in again and you can just allow that to happen without forcing anything. Repeat until you feel better.
While this sounds a bit ridiculous and is a favorite with many Littles, it is actually surprisingly scientific. Doing this activates the ventral vagus (aka ‘Bob’) to help us get out of our physical stress response and calm down. More on that in the polyvagal theory. While I am not always recommending breathing exercises as the best tool to use against mild dissociation, I recommend this one.
I hope you found something new. Always remember to breathe, it is kind of important.
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