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Polyvagal Therapy

by Theresa on July 8, 2019 in english, Self-regulation, therapy

Science about the vagus is an exciting new trend, it gets marketed as having almost magical powers to help people feel better. So I get quite a lot of emails asking for ways to ‘strengthen’ the vagus or how to ‘stimulate’ it. I think that this is based on a misunderstanding. Let me clarify. […]

Epiphany #6: The Good

by Theresa on July 5, 2019 in english, other

The perception of a reward leads to sympathetic arousal in our nervous system. Similarly to flight/fight (run away/ approach to overcome) energy is released to approach and get the reward. When a reward is overwhelmingly big we start to shut down. Think of people winning the lottery and fainting or hearing they won a prize […]

DBT Skills, chronic dissociation and a polyvagal perspective

by Theresa on June 30, 2019 in DBT Skills, english, Self-regulation, theory

When we learn how to stop dissociation we often get in contact with DBT skill training. It teaches us how to recognize dissociation early and then use different skills that we chain to help us regulate and return to our window of tolerance. Theoretically that is a good plan that can work really well. It […]

Integrating ‘new’ parts (DID SystemWork)

by Theresa on June 23, 2019 in basics, DID, english

When parts have been stuck in TraumaTime for so long, arriving in the present, learning that there are others and all of life has changed, that we have aged, the body is big – all that can come as a shock. That is why we have developed a protocol for ourselves for welcoming ‘new’ parts. […]

Titration in Trauma Therapy

by Theresa on June 14, 2019 in basics, DID, english, Self-regulation, theory, therapy

Titration is a chemical term that was taken out of context to explain a technique to approach psychological problems. Say we want to neutralize HCl with NaOH. Mixing the acid with the base should, with an easy calculation, give us H2O and NaCl, harmless water and salt. The problem is that an acid and a […]

Containment (in body work)

by Theresa on June 1, 2019 in english, Self-regulation, theory, therapy

There is a crucial part of emotional regulation that has to happen somewhere between identifying a feeling and expressing it. Because it is physical in its nature, not a mental concept, it makes it difficult for me to explain it with words. So I will use pictures in the hope that you can translate them […]

Understanding thoughts ‘bottom up’

by Theresa on May 27, 2019 in english, mindset & thoughts, Self-regulation, theory

There is a feedback-loop between our thoughts, emotions and body. A picture you will often see to describe it is this It is the foundation of CBT interventions. We change the thought, that will change our emotion and physical state. It is called top-down approach and it works well with many psychological problems but its […]

Emotions: Explore, Express, Expand

by Theresa on May 11, 2019 in Emotions, english, Self-regulation

If we are within our window of tolerance and there is an emotion we are experiencing and there is no need to regulate it down but a curiosity about what is happening to us, that is when we might want to explore. To do that, creative approaches are indispensable. We won’t try to suppress an […]

Provocation: advanced negotiation skills

by Theresa on April 28, 2019 in communication & relationships, english, therapy

Deliberate provocation is a specific form of confrontation. It is one of our sharpest tools for negotiations. It can cut through the knot that keeps us stuck and open the path for breakthrough. It can also cut deeply and painfully when it is done wrong, creating shame and disconnection and despair. The effectiveness of […]

Negotiating Emotion

by Theresa on April 23, 2019 in DID, Emotions, english, for helpers, Self-regulation

It is normal for traumatized people to avoid the sensation of emotion. TraumaTime taught us that it is too much to handle. Since we are not living in TraumaTime anymore and emotion is a big part of feeling alive and happy, it is time to get in touch with our feelings again. The level of […]

Epiphany #5: The State of Shame

by Theresa on April 20, 2019 in english, other

Our stress responses come with emotions attached. In flight we feel fear, in fight anger. The emotion that belongs to freeze is shame. In freeze we submit to the one stronger than us, an ancient way of creating a social hierarchy. Shame supports that by telling us our place. “The story follows the state“. We […]

The Polyvagal Ladder

by Theresa on April 17, 2019 in basics, english, Self-regulation, theory

When I first wrote about the polyvagal theory I didn’t expect you to be interested. But there has been an ever increasing demand for more information, so here it is. We are still leaving out most of the neuroscience behind the polyvagal theory to make it easier to work with. People used to think […]