Putting goals into words helps to achieve them. But if they are vague you are not giving yourself enough information and detail to guide yourself toward that goal. We recommend making SMART goals. Specific/simple/sensible/significant: What do you want to achieve, and what does that look like, in detail, in specific situations, in specific behaviors […]
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The value of values
A concept we grew up with is the purpose train. We often get caught up in strategies and tactics in our life, making goals, achieving things. Those work best when we actually have a vision to go before them. But it turns out that a “vision board” is not enough either. The energy that moves […]
The inner Archive (SystemWork)
During Phase 1 of your therapy (stabilization) working through traumatic memories is not the main focus. But that doesn’t stop trauma memory from coming up. So, what do we do with that? The answer is containment. We have already introduced you to the basic and advanced version and one that is littles-friendly. Now let us […]
Unicorn-Moments for weekends
A lot of SystemWork is about finding balance between extremes. Action/work and relaxation/fun is one of the important pairs of virtues (see v-square) that need to be balanced. Both are good and needed, but one without the other will harm us long-term. More about negotiating relaxation During the week our life is very structured and […]
Balance: the v-square
To increase inner balance we are using a theoretical concept described by a german psychologist named Paul Helwig and expanded by F. Schulz von Thun. The concept is called „Wertequadrat“ which literally translates as „square of virtues“ which makes it a wrong translation (it has nothing to do with freemasons and we are aware that […]
Using anger (advanced)
We like to compare anger to a bonfire. If it is burning too high and gets out of control it can be destructive. If we manage to kindle it properly we can have s’mores. Like fire anger is not inherently bad. It just holds a lot of energy. Many traumatized people are scared of the […]
The 3 Phases of Therapy 1: Stabilization
Trauma and DID therapists commonly agree on working with a 3-phase-model. It describes an order in which to do work for the best, fastest and safest results. In an attempt to keep articles short we will share about the different phases in separate articles. The 3 phases are Stabilization Trauma work Integration Here is […]
Book review: Growing beyond Survival (E. Vermilyea)
Growing beyond survival – a self-help toolkit for managing traumatic stress – by Elisabeth Vermilyea Written for: people with PTSD Special focus: self-help, practical exercises What it is not: a book specifically about coping with extreme dissociation about DID Language: Everything is explained step by step, psychological terms are explained with easy […]
Book review: the dissociative identity disorder sourcebook (D. B. Haddock)
Written for: people interested in DID. Some is for therapists, some for patients, a little for significant others. Some of the information is specific for the US only. Special focus: it doesn’t have one. This book offers broad information about DID. That is its greatest strength and weakness at the same time. […]
Your (scrap)book of resources
To support therapy and stabilization it helps to collect all the resources you have found or learned and keep them in one place. That is why we own a resource (scrap)book. It is a visual and tangible reminder of helpful and positive things. Being creative when making it also deepens our understanding of our coping […]
Regulators
The three main concepts we need for self-regulation (as opposed to relational regulation) are gauges, regulators and containers. While imagery, breathing techniques, relaxation exercises, DBT Skills, mindfulness, distraction etc are all „regulators“, you can literally use a regulator to return to your window of tolerance. Before you start to create a regulator you might want […]
Book review: The therapeutic treasure box … (Dr K. Treisman)
The therapeutic treasure box for working with children and adolescents with developmental trauma – creative techniques and activities – by Dr Karen Treisman Written for: therapists who treat traumatized children and adolescents. Also people working in foster care. Some exercises are clearly therapy work though and should only be done with a therapist present. […]
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